It's December...

...so I'm allowed to do this!

I'm Feeling Better

I've been feeling really crappy today. I've had a temperature of about 39°C and I've been lying in bed feeling more or less dead. In the end I took a painkiller, slept for a while and when I woke up I felt okay. The fever is gone, and I don't have to lie down all the time. So I've moved to the sofa. Planning on staying here till it's time to sleep and then wake up happy and feeling well tomorrow!

My arm hurts a bit, but not as much as everyone says theirs does. It hurts when I do some things, but most of the time it's okay. I mean, the fever and how I've been feeling today have been waaaaay worse than the pain in my arm.

Bläääääääääööööö

I've been trying to sleep for a while now, but at 6am I gave up!! My arm's been trying to kill me more or less since I went to bed. Then I began feeling ill.
Got up at 6am just to notice that I've got a fever. And I feel preeeeetty crap. So now I'm lying in bed with my computer, listening to Radio X3M, trying not to use my left arm (which is hard since I'm writing..).

I reeeeally don't feel like getting up today.

I wish

Dear Santa,
I can't say there's much I wish for this Christmas. As usual I have no idea what I want. But there's one thing though: I want to go to England. I kind of miss that country. A lot. We get along quite well.

Oh, and I wouldn't mind some extra time so that I can study but still have time off. 'Cos I guess you do know stress isn't much fun. Too much to do, and there's not enough time to do even half of it. I mean, with all those wish lists to read and all those other things to do before Christmas you probably know what I'm talking about.

A nice body without having to work for it wouldn't be that bad either. Yeah, I'd like that, please.

I need 2010 to be a good year for me. It's an important year. Please, PLEASE, make things work out okay for me! I couldn't stand seeing another dream being crushed.

Money would be good, too. I don't know why, but somehow everyhting's expensive. I'm doing okay, though. I just wish I didn't have to think twice before buying things I want.

I guess I could tell you that I want world peace and stuff as well. That would be nice. I'm reading about the Cold War, and I've noticed how childish most of the stuff were. Could you please just make some people a bit more grown-up? Or should I turn to God when I wish for that..?

In the end I know that neither you, nor anyone else, will give me these things this Christmas. And do you know something? I don't even care. Just like evey year I'll spend this Christmas with people I love, and that I know love me, and to me that is worth more than gifts.




I've been lazy. Can't come up with anything to write.
Today I took that vaccine everyone's talking about. I'm still alive. I kind of decided not to take it but changed my mind. I know it would be waaaay better to actually get the illness, but there's no guarantee I'll actually get it. And as some might know I don't really have much time to be ill next spring. I'm not sure it'll listen to me if I say that January and then April, May and more or less any date after 5th June would be okay to be ill, but I'm busy in December, February, March and the beginning of June.
Anyway, why am I writing this? It's not like I have to defend myself... People who are against it won't understand it anyway, not even if I told them every single reason why I changed my mind.

:'(

Most of the time everyhting's alright, but from time to time I just miss him like crazy...

I don't wanna a fight
Don't wanna be afraid
I'm falling straight into you
Are everything that I need right now
I have fallen for you
Turn off the lights cos you're killing me
Can't take these eyes that you're giving me
We've hurt each other before
Can't take the pain anymore
Turn out the lights cos I wanna hide
I gotta know you are by my side
Don't wanna lose you now
When we're so good together
Matt Willis - Falling Into You

Fill my little world right up

I got home from school less than an hour ago. Took a shower, changed to my pyjamas and I'm now sitting curled up in the sofa with a cup of hot chocolate, some schoolbooks and my calender.
I'm one of those (annoying?) people who can't live without my calender. It's more or less my diary now that I can't be bothered to actually write anything in my real diary. Most of the important things are written down. Some pages are more or less filled with notes, other pages are filled with lines from different songs. Some days I've even written what times Nene's got volley (okay, that's usually the weeks I'm cooking, so that I know when dinner should be ready).

I don't think I'd like it if someone else read my calender. It's my notes. It's a part of my life that's written on those pages!

I have to be able to see what's gonna happen. I want to feel like I'm in control of my life. I have to know times and dates. But it's not like I'm always checking things. When I get home from school I usually don't even open my calender for any other reason than to check what I'm supposed to do for school, and then if there's anything else I should remember. It's not like I'm going insane if I don't have it with me all the time.

Just remember to smile, smile, smile :)

"Learn to look within yourself for appreciation and acceptance and give yourself permission to seek a better and more fulfilling life every day. It is not in how others treat you that can make a difference in your life, but it is in how you treat yourself."
- Unknown

I'm on my way back to school really soon. I've just watched an episode of Dr Who and eaten noodles, with a spoon.

Today is a good day.

Except for the fact that I just looked out the window and noticed that it's raining. A lot.